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Discover how simple family traditions, for the holidays and every day, can foster stronger bonds and stability, creating lasting memories for all.

Introduction

Family traditions, the activities, routines, and behaviors repeated and passed down from generation to generation within a family, play a crucial role in strengthening family bonds. They can be as simple as a weekly taco night or as involved as a large family reunion, complete with competition, prizes, and consistent family recipes. As you work with families, encouraging them to create traditions that work for their family will go a long way to building a safe, consistent environment for everyone to thrive.

According to Taylor Wendt with WebMB, “Traditions in families form an important part of your social structure and even contribute to your sense of identity. They can come from your country’s culture, your religion, or even your family itself.” 

And while traditions can contribute substantially to a family’s identity, they do not need to be big in nature. It could be as simple as a forehead kiss before bed every night or a special handshake only the family knows about that creates lasting memories and a sense of stability. 

The Role of Family Traditions in Building Strong Bonds

Family traditions allow children to better understand their family’s history and roots. They also create a sense of emotional safety, predictability, and positive family dynamics. In fact, a study on the “Did You Know…” questions developed by Drs. Robyn Fivush and Marshall Duke found that by understanding family histories, “Adolescents who report knowing more stories about their familial past show higher levels of emotional well-being, and also higher levels of identity achievement, even when controlling for general level of family functioning. “

“Like routines, they provide predictability and a sense of security and safety. Family traditions help children feel as though they fit in somewhere. And in time, the traditions come to define who each person in the family is, countering alienation, and offering steadiness and certainty,” says the Institute for Family Studies.  

Traditions create a shared sense of identity, belonging, and connection within families, giving children and parents alike a touchstone to come back to feel grounded and secure both within themselves and with each other.

Examples of Family Traditions at the Holidays

The holidays offer a great opportunity to create new family traditions. Regardless of the religious practices, or lack there of, for the families you support, you can offer some exciting and enjoyable family traditions for them to establish. Some examples of holiday family traditions are:

• Making a special holiday dish to serve that’s unique and special to your family, or a classic dish that has your family’s spin on it 
• Taking a night to decorate your home together
• Starting a holiday-themed collection – like nutcrackers or winter-themed Lego sets
• Set aside a night to read a holiday-inspired book together, or watch a holiday movie (bonus points if you have fun snacks to keep consistent year to year)
• Baking, decorating, and enjoying holiday cookies

The point of holiday traditions is to create connection, especially during a relatively busy time of year. If a tradition starts to create more stress, it’s likely one a family won’t continue with, so encourage families to simplify or adapt their traditions to be as easy as possible. For example, if they do an annual cookie decorating night, but the mixing, chilling, and baking the cookies is too much of a mess, buying pre-baked cookies is an easy solution that keeps the tradition alive with less of a stressor on the parents.

Everyday Traditions That Foster Connection and Stability

Family traditions don’t just happen once a year, establishing a routine for daily or weekly traditions creates a more stable foundation for everyone to thrive. Some examples of more routine traditions include:

• Weekly family game night
• Dance parties after dinner, but before clean up
• Sunday pancake breakfast
• Sharing a nightly bedtime story 
  • For parents who travel, they can record a chapter or two before they leave for the kids to enjoy while they’re on the road, or they can bring the book with them to have a FaceTime reading session
• Sharing highs and lows, or roses and thorns, at family dinner

These routines and traditions don’t need to be forced, many come naturally and should be embraced. 

How to Start and Maintain Family Traditions

Families who are looking to start traditions should recognize that traditions start as something they do once, and then repeat. A tradition doesn’t feel like a tradition the first time. By starting on a small, flexible scale, and by prioritizing the enjoyment of connection over the perfection of the “tradition,” the families you work with will be encouraged to continue their version of their traditions for days, weeks, or years to come. 

If a family starts to lose the connection to the tradition, let them know it’s ok to evolve how they celebrate and come together as a family. The whole point is shared joy and feeling closer as a family unit.

Conclusion

Family traditions foster stronger bonds, emotional safety, and lasting memories for every member of the family. By starting new things now, they quickly turn into traditions over time. Whether big or small, the traditions and routines the families you work with decide to celebrate will play a significant role in creating a stable and connected family environment. 

These traditions can include traditional and chosen families and can be for everyday moments of connection or yearly gatherings, especially around the holidays.

Call to Action

Encourage the families you work with to identify things they’d consider their current traditions, or start a new tradition this week. What you hear might surprise you! Please feel free to share with us ways your families are celebrating, bonding and identifying traditions, we love to hear from you!